Introducing ME- Part 2  

Posted by Nitu in ,

[ Thanks to all of you...your wishes make me feel younger by one year :)
For a couple of days I have been engrossed in work and mating, oops meeting people. I shall start visiting all of your blogs soon. Until then, introducing ME- part 2.]

"I need result, Dr., result, not risk."
"Yes sir. I understand."
But in reality, Dr. GenieAss was wondering how many times his own ass would need to be sacrificed for nurturing an eternal ass. Then again, playing God is not easy, neither serving an omnipresent asshole.

"What's the remedy?"
"Deploy the subject on a hostile planet..to be precise on the earth...Sir.."
"What?????"
A deaf frog suddenly jumped out of the window to escape from the dreaded decibel.
"Dr., you can't do that. Remember the subject omega-factor-11? You deployed it there. What damage..god..what inconceivable damage it had done to me! Do you think people worship me? Hell, no, people worship him. He is the God, not me. Damn it."

How can Dr. GenieAss forget that? God never misses an opportunity to remind him of the mistake.

God was referring to Jesus. It is a sour to the core topic. How could someone defeat him in his own game! No, he can't let that happen again. No, never.

"But sir, human beings have evolved ever since. They are now more arrogant, more intolerant, more cruel, more callous. No one trusts anyone, no one agrees with anyone. They have got a system called, democracy sir. The possibility of Jesus happening again is virtually nil in the present scenario."

"Yeah, that I realize. But..."
"To clutter a perfect mind with shits, there is no better place than earth, sir. One just doesn't get along another on that planet." Dr. GenieAss argued.

God weighed the options. At any cost, the subject can't be deployed in an advanced, peaceful planet. That will favor the development of the subject. Who knows what will happen to his supremacy then. Yes, humiliation is better than extinction.

"Alright, let it be the earth then." Between bad and worse, god wisely chose the bad.
"Any deployment target?" - target is the code name for a womb.

"Sir we have already zeroed down on a couple. But the couple is expecting a girl, not boy."
"Dr., I am not here to fulfill expectations, you understand..not to fulfill. I am here to manage the things."

Dr. GenieAss understood the discussion was over. Why every boss talks the same language, or rather every asshole!

So as result of the contingency measure on god's chamber, on 1980, 6th June, around 4 p.m. a truck was rushing towards the town hospital, to its labor room to be precise, in the upper most place of Assam, called Sadiya. This time, however, the truck didn't carry my uncle's timbers, but my mother!
And at 5.17 p.m., the horribly had gone wrong, heavenly research subject was incarnated on the earth.

What followed thereafter was a chain of "wtf" reactions.

On my abnormally tiny size....
The gynecologist- "wtf? Is it a rabbit or a new species on the earth?"
My father - "wtf? So much efforts, so little result!!!"

On my high-pitched marathon cry....
An old women patient who occupied a bed near to mine- "wtf? Son of a bitch or donkey?"
My young mother- "wtf? How to pacify a baby!!!"

And on the world....
Me- "wtf? The conspiracy to suppress my voice has already begun!!!"

This entry was posted on Wednesday, June 18, 2008 at Wednesday, June 18, 2008 and is filed under , . You can follow any responses to this entry through the comments feed .

19 comments

hehehe :))

June 19, 2008 at 2:11 AM

!@#$%^&*I())(*&^%$@!@

June 19, 2008 at 6:37 AM

lol...

and the world changed ever after...

God is still in trouble.. ;-)

June 19, 2008 at 8:10 AM

Boo hoo;) Ur other side of humor is damn good.

June 19, 2008 at 9:06 AM

Lols!That's so cute.Very innovative write-up :)

June 19, 2008 at 1:01 PM

..."My father - "wtf? So much efforts, so little result!!!"...."

Dats a classic line !
So.. finally U come to Earth !

June 19, 2008 at 10:18 PM

@Amrita,
:)
@Kousik,
Aaw..now that's the language of god..Kahi tu Dr. GenieAss to nahi tha?
@Anusha,
Yes, ofcourse. The heaven changed ever after too :)
@Priya,
I believe so :) Thank u. I can believe now for one more day :)
@Sameera,
Thank u. Innovative? I m not sure though. If my mom knows I m blowing out her glory moment this way, I m sure, I will pray to all the gods on the heaven :)
@Debasish,
Thnks.
Yes, of course on the earth..well, unless u say this is Crypton (land of supermen) :)

June 22, 2008 at 10:03 AM

LOL, you have a great innovative writing style.

June 22, 2008 at 6:59 PM

Lol,Nitu.

Ho innovative and TERRIBLY cute!

Tee hee :)
Btw you're requested to be at my blog soon :D


Cheers!

June 25, 2008 at 11:18 PM

funnily cute...cutely funny :)

June 26, 2008 at 3:36 AM

Whats on,babe?

Where are you these days?

June 28, 2008 at 9:32 AM

was such a good read. too good.

June 28, 2008 at 10:35 PM

lol

So funny

July 3, 2008 at 10:56 AM

Lol!Then I hope she never reads this :P

No updates?

TC.Cheers!

July 3, 2008 at 11:51 AM

did you read a lot of sci fi stuffs while growing up?:-)

July 3, 2008 at 8:44 PM

buahahahhahaha :)
dr. genieass.. heeeee.. n a dead frogjumped off.. hilarious!!
n tiny little thing.. n everyone already trying to supress your voice of the messiah hmmm ;);)

ya rock!!
so is there a part 3?

July 8, 2008 at 8:28 PM

buahahahhahaha :)
dr. genieass.. heeeee.. n a dead frogjumped off.. hilarious!!
n tiny little thing.. n everyone already trying to supress your voice of the messiah hmmm ;);)

ya rock!!
so is there a part 3?

July 8, 2008 at 8:28 PM

LOL!

Nice :P

July 19, 2008 at 10:36 AM

Hey no updates? :)

July 20, 2008 at 1:59 AM

Post a Comment